Through different routes, all seem to be chasing one common goal, the goal of ‘Happiness’. It would not be wrong to say everyone wants to be happy in life. Be it by earning more money, holding a power position, following your passion, travelling, buying a house, starting a family……through all of it people are just trying to be at a place where they are happy.
Through multiple ways all are working towards this one goal and yet it’s the most wanted. Is it such a difficult goal to achieve or there seem to be something missing? Thought about it a little longer and went a little deeper, what emerged was interesting.
Despite being the ultimate goal in life, it is also the one thing people avoid the most. People are too busy or too scared to be happy. Being happy is postponed or consciously avoided. When you are happy, you either doubt it, compare with others, and numb it, get scared or don’t acknowledge it at all. What a paradoxical situation to be in.
If its sounding strange – read further and see if it happens with you.
Think of a time when you were having a real good time and were genuinely happy. Did you feel a sense of unknown worry catching up suddenly from somewhere? Or you started to doubt yourself for having fun when others are slogging at work/life. Whatever the reason your happiness is impacted.
You silently look and admire the person you love – your parents, partner, children…you feel that warmth deep in your heart and you suddenly get scared- “ what if something happens to them?’ And your mind immediately moves away, missing the joyful moment you were in.
“How are you? How are things? “are the most common questions asked. Yet we mostly hear “I am ok, things are fine” kind of responses. It’s rare to hear people say “fantastic “or things are rocking”. People consciously underplay the fact of everything going good or even fine. It is strange because the opposite is not true. When things are not going fine, people are vocal “Life is a mess, I am in deep trouble…”
Why? Why is everyone so averse to the thing they have been aspiring for?
We are consciously or sub consciously depriving ourselves from the feeling of being happy and thus living life fully.
People are worried about something going wrong, they don’t want to feel happy now, there is still lot to achieve and feeling happy now may make them complacent, they want to postpone being happy to a time when all boxes are ticked. People underplay/overlook their happiness, seeing someone not being happy.
It takes courage in allowing yourself to be happy, it takes a strong belief in yourself for being worthy of happiness. What we have is today, no one knows what lies ahead, there is uncertainty. By not feeling happy you are not keeping the risk associated with this uncertainty in check, you are just depriving yourself of being happy in the moment.
Future is uncertain, no one knows if all your boxes will ever get ticked or there will be new boxes that will get added. Sacrificing your current happiness for the unknown future deprives you of the happiness and joy now.
Everyone has a unique and different journey, what choices you make, what you get and have is all part of your unique journey. Overlooking or underplaying your happiness because someone else is not feeling the same, is doubting your own journey. Being happy for what you have doesn’t makes you insensitive or selfish, it makes you trustworthy.
Being truly happy for what you have today doesn’t make you lazy, complacent or arrogant, it makes you grateful. It strengthens your faith that takes away the fear of what can go wrong, you allow yourself to be truly happy in the moment for what you have and experience what you have been longing for- happiness.
Being happy in the moment will not guard you against the uncertainties of life, it will allow you to live a fuller and richer life.